Helen Minty sees more common ground in Nancy Kline’s approach and the Schuitema thematic on Coaching:
· Coaching is an act of generosity.
All parties to the coaching process, the coach, the coachee and the coachee’s manager (or sponsoring client), as well as anyone asked to give feedback regarding the coachee’s values or behaviour, place themselves in a place of giving. They are giving their time and paying attention in a unique way, with the intention of assisting in a process of personal growth. This will be for themselves, if they are the coachee, or for the person being coached if they are assisting in any other capacity.
The sharing of information requires trust in terms of having the courage to tell it as it is. It also requires the recipient to trust the intent of the person offering the feedback. There has to be trust between the coachee and coachee. The ability to listen attentively to feedback is critically important, especially when it is negative, so the coach must prepare the environment to facilitate this. The coach also needs to pay attention to the responses of those receiving feedback and be prepared to create an appropriate dialogue.
While asking questions is an important part of the coaching process, in order to gather information, asking what Nancy Kline calls incisive questions is one of the most powerful tools in the coach’s toolbox. Often, the intention of incisive questions is to help the coachee identify any unhelpful assumptions he is making or any limiting beliefs he is holding.
These are often not in the person’s conscious awareness, which is why we say coaching has the power to make the unconscious conscious. This leads the coachee to begin exploring alternative mindsets or actions.
Listening from both parties is, once again essential in this process. The need to be “right” can sabotage this interaction and the coach especially must be able to suspend his own agenda in service of his client. The coach must never position herself as having all the answers. Her role is to facilitate her client to find her own answers.
Nancy asserts that reciprocity creates better conditions for thinking. It is essential for the coach to show respect for the coachee’s thoughts and opinions as well as a genuine interest in the well-being of his client. Coach and coachee become equal partners in thinking. Our thoughts do not need to be fully formed before we express them. Sometimes thinking happens as we speak and coaching creates a respectful “space” to allow this to happen.
Showing appreciation is seen as vital, from both Nancy Kline’s and Schuitema’s perspectives. A coach needs to be appreciative of the coachee’s progress and courage in tackling issues that may not be easy for them. Nancy Kline explains that being appreciated increases our intelligence. Research has shown that an effective ratio of appreciation to correction in one to five.
On the other hand, the coachee is held accountable by the coach for progress and, at times, the feedback given will be corrective. Schuitema recognises the importance of accountability. Correction will be carried out in a respectful manner that clearly explains the intent behind it. It will be backed up by facts, and with opportunities for the coachee to think through the feedback. The coachee will also be given opportunities to respond and to be listened to by the coach.
· Coaching is a powerful process for facilitating change
It is rendered more powerful through the coach’s genuine intent to be of service to others, through incisive questioning and through effective listening.
Cheers,
Helen