There are more similarities than differences between people “who make it” and the rest of us. I am sure that you know people who are very successful, and when you compare them with yourself you cannot really see a difference. You might even know them from childhood, or university, etc. But, they are successful, and you might at present be only like everybody else. Your personal observation is backed by lots of psychological research. There are no significant differences in competence, intelligence, race, education, and age between peak performers and everybody else.
However, there must be some difference, because they are tops, and I am not. The difference is in the “fruit salad” of components that in combination leads to people using what they have to excel. Here are some of the components that make up the “fruit salad’.
- Winners have a destination, a dream, a clearly defined outcome. This outcome they can see, hear and feel. They can put words to this outcome, and they frequently talk about this outcome, and their intention of making it come real.
- The dream, destination of winners is more than a “knowing” it is a compelling reality. In their thinking it is beyond a wish, it is something that they want, and do to get.
- The winners devote time, resources and energy to their compelling destiny. The plan and organize their activities for and around it.
- The winners are actively busy with their destiny; it is an overriding priority for them. They do things with reference to their destiny, they say yes or no with reference to their destiny. They think and hold their destiny alive if they have to shift priorities for a moment, but they never let go.
- Winners never let their destiny go disappear in the mist of doing other, urgent things. Even if other things occasionally ask their attention, they drift back to what is important as soon as possible. They do a number of things not to forget, and to ward of distractions.
- They display a particular kind of confidence, namely a strong anticipation of success in the future. Because their outcome is real, and they work actively on their intention for achieving it, and take little and big steps towards it all the time, their confidence is based on facts and not just a quirk of “positive thinking”.
How to become a winner? By “getting 6”
- Get your story. Go deep inside, and get the answer to the story of your life. What pleases you? What attracts you? Which of your talents carries a passion with it? What actions/work gives you a pleasure even if nobody notices? What makes you feel alive and good about being alive?
- Get Your Outcome. For example: how to make the positive lessons from your story the pivot point for deciding on an outcome. There might be many things you don’t want, but get an “approach outcome”: what do you want (instead of)? “If it is to be, it is up to me” and take the first step.
- Get Your Possibilities. What are some options and possibilities to do, which you need to consider. Possibilities include things, information, people, places, and activities which are needed for the steps to get you to you destiny.
- Get (come to) a Decision. What will you be doing, by when, under what circumstances. How will you remember to remember to do these new things and not to forget that this is a step to your destiny?
- Get your (and others’) commitment. Now that you know, contract with yourself how to take the steps (size and tempo that will work for you) and take the first step. Success starts with the first step, no matter how small.
- Get your follow up. How will you know you are on track? Whose feedback, and/or what kind of feedback do you need so that if necessary, you can make course changes. Or, information that will allow you to celebrate your successes-in-action as you go towards your outcome.