My girlfriend thinks I’m a procrastinator. She goes so far as to say that I’m like the designer of the Japanese flag. You know the one, the red circle on the white background.
She’s right you know. I am a procrastinator. I’m like, “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done the day after tomorrow just as well.”
I actually wanted to write on the subject of procrastination a couple of months ago. And, here it is, three months later. Ironic really.
So, why do I procrastinate? I get that as Edward Young said, that, “Procrastination is the thief of time”, and that I only have 2-billion seconds or so to play on this planet. So, why don’t I do what should be done today but rather put it off for tomorrow or for never? I really don’t have that much time to waste now do I?
I think that for me there are two very clear reasons.
First, there are just some things that I really don’t like doing, even though they need to be done. A courageous conversation. Filling in a tax form. Picking up dog poop. Sending invoices (actually I don’t really mind doing that since money won’t miraculously appear in my bank account). Writing articles. Keeping my social media content up-to-date. There’s so many better things to do. Like sorting out my sock drawer. Reading one of the six books I’ve got on the go at the moment. Watching a rerun of Friends for the 3rd time. Wiping my computer with disinfectant. Sorting out my desk. Cleaning out unwanted or unread emails from my inbox. Obviously, I get that when one thinks sorting out his sock drawer is more important than say … sending an invoice … then one has a problem. It’s classic avoidance.
Second, I clearly don’t like the mundane and banality of everyday life. Getting up, eating, going to work, eating, going home, eating, sleeping, getting up … I think that I’ve watched too many movies. In an hour and a half one has half a dozen adventures, gets the smoking hot femme fatale and saves the world. Most days the only ‘adventure’ I have is spilling my coffee in the saucer. So, what do I do to combat this banality? Of course, I leave everything for the last second. Each crisis and drama that is caused by my procrastination makes me come alive (and stresses out every other living soul involved). I can do things quickly and be the hero of my own story.
I can knock up an article in 20 minutes and just beat the deadline (this article took 32 minutes). I deliver the story with five minutes to spare and both Enid and Annemarie from the Volksrust Recorder breathe a sigh of relief (I write a small column called Change Your Story for the newspaper every week). Like they need more stress! I’m the hero and saved the day. Problem is that I actually caused the stress for everyone (including myself) because I selfishly wanted to feel alive. But it is addictive and I can’t help it. Me versus the clock. It’s an adrenaline rush and it does keep the boredom away.
Can I change? Can I stop procrastinating? I think so. I just need to reframe the way I see my life. You see, every moment that I get to play is a blessing. I may depart this life any second from now. So, every task, be it mundane or magnificent is a gift that has been given to me. Every thing I do and every lesson I learn is there to help make me a better person. That invoice that gets sent pays for my daughter’s education, her acting and her music lessons. Filling in my tax form could keep me out of jail. That conversation I’ve been avoiding could make a real difference. Writing articles feed my soul and every now and then add to my bank account. Picking up dog poop … mmm, I still can’t sell myself on that one.
I suppose that what I’m getting to realise is that I shouldn’t put off for tomorrow what I can do today. I already have the most extraordinary life and should savour every moment that has been graced to me. I like to believe that I’m a warrior. And, if I’m going to be a true warrior, I should heed the words of Don Juan, Carlos Castaneda’s spiritual teacher: “A warrior doesn’t wish to be anywhere else but in this moment.” I get that every moment and every task no matter how banal, is an opportunity to hone my blade so that I can be the best warrior I can be. And, of course, there’s still a bit of ego left in me and a need to leave a legacy. So, these words by Donald Gardner have made me take notice, “Do you know what happens when you give a procrastinator a good idea? Nothing!” I don’t want to be that guy. The guy that did nothing with his potential. Do you?
Footnote: I actually don’t mind being called the designer of the Japanese flag. It may be a simple design but the symbolism is quite sublime: The white on Japan’s flag represents honesty, purity of the Japanese people and integrity. The red sun disk represents the sun goddess Amaterasu who was the founder of Japan. The red disk symbolises a bright future for the country. Source: www.reference.com